New Prints!!

Today I went to an interview at the Double Tree Hotel. I got hired on the spot and the guy said, "Well we'll go ahead and give you a drug trest and then just call us when youre available to start working." Uh.....what...?! I had no idea they drug tested, and me being me, smoked 2 days ago. I was fucked. The girl followed me to the restroom, stayed outside the restroom until I was done, and I checked positive for THC. She said they had to take it in for further testing and would call me. HAH! Yeah right...

Then I decided to go take pictures and went to Benson Park. I was getting ready to leave and my car started and then immediately died. I didn't have anymore gas left, and my gas light never went off. So I was stuck at the gas station across the street for a good 2hrs. Apparently no one carries gas cans anymore.

By that time, I had to go to class. We listened to all swing music in the lab. It was the shit. I went crazy today. I printed as much as I could get done. It looks like I might have some pictures to work with for sense of place already, but I'm not crazy about any of them.

Go check them out on my facebook or photobucket. (http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v231/kramekrame)

peace and love!

Pissed

The whole day was completely wasted.
My teacher told me to go to 93rd & maple to get my camera fixed. Well.....there isnt any camera repair store anywhere around there. I came back home and looked online for other ones. It said there was a store called Flat Land on 87th and fort. I drove there, and guess what....theres nothing there except a bunch of houses, and the human society. I asked 2 or 3 people where this fuckin store was and theyd never heard of it. So I finally decided to give up and just went to Rockbrook. The guy there told me that it would cost $150 just to fix my shutter. Fuck that.....
So I went to the other Rockbrook on 168th and they told me it wouldnt be worth it to put $150 into it and that they would sell me a body for $90. FUUUUCKKKKK!!!! I don't have $90. I get paid tom or Thurs, and I really hope its tom cuz today and tomorrow are like the only sunny days all week.
I spent the whole day running around town, and not being able to take pictures, or make prints, or do anything I wanted to do today.
I'm so pissed off right now, the whole day was wasted. Now I have to go to work for 8 or 9hrs. SWEEEEEEEEEETTT!!!

Class

Tonight was a huge disappointment. I went in early to develop my film, did everything perfectly, and STILL showed up with not even 15 pictures, out of 2 rolls. I was so pissed. One of the rolls, I even cheated and just set it to program, and I only got 1 picture from that one. 1! So I had my teacher check out my camera for the 2nd time, and apparently theres some shit on the shutter making it stick together and not open. Here I was thinking I was doing something wrong...
I have to take it in to get cleaned off tomorrow. Its supposed to be sunny all day and our sense of place assignment is due mon, and motion due weds. I'm really excited. The tough one is going to be motion. I want to take pictures of people and during the week they can be hard to find.
I made some prints tonight, but they're not quite perfected yet. Tonights music choice: Michael Jackson. It was awesome. I still need to do some filters/burning and dodging/getting rid of my spots on my film. Hopefully I can get those on here tomorrow before work.
I skipped class last Weds and it totally just threw me off track. I didn't get to hear him talk about pinhole cameras, or watch videos about a famous photographer, or hear about stuff going on during the weekend, or hear him talk about. Man....that really bums me out. I don't think I ever wanna skip class again. I don't really have a good reason as to why I skipped either. I just said, "I don't feel like it" and didn't go.
Anyways....
We watched this old film projector of Henri Cartier Bresson with the tape player being played next to it. It was total 70's, and it was great. He was the one speaking the whole time, and he is the coolest dude ever. The way he views photography is so interesting to me. "The photograph itself doesn't interest me. I want only to capture a minute part of reality." He's a French photographer who was considered to be the father of modern photojournalism, and helped develop street photography. He's traveled all over the world to places like China, India, Mexico, Canada, Japan, and the Soviet Union during 1960-1970. Everything hes photographed hes been known to just be in the right place at the right time.
Here's some of my favorites:







A-mazing.

I'm thinkin about taking Advanced Experimental Photography this summer. My teacher is the one that will be teaching it, and from what he told me it sounds like it'll be bomb. It will be from 10-5 Mon and Weds though. I don't know if I want to do that. I can always take it in the Fall, but I've just been thinkin about it. A part of me wants to just be crazy busy this summer, but I gotta take a break sometime right?


Alright....
peeeeeace

Boredom

It sucks that everyone has class in the morning....except me.
I don't ever have anything to do/have anyone to hang out with during the week, so that leaves me sitting here, watching tv for hours, and loosing my mind.
Gap didn't schedule me allllllll week. What the fuck am I spose to do with that? I might as well just fuckin quit. It's not worth it anymore. I just need something that I can do everyday that will keep me going. I just don't want a full time job until after the summer is over.

I really think I might just get in my car and drive. There's nothing to do, no one call, and the night is young.

Peace out

Can't Sleep

I just got home....and I don't think I could sleep even if I tried.
It's like I have to completely drain myself out or something? Who knows....
I know once I fall asleep I'm gunna have some crazy ass dream. It's been happening almost every night, and I've been writing them down, and holy shit. Its just crazy to me. I dream so much (and remember it) I don't understand it.

Well....

I dont have anything else to say.



Peace
love

Rookies

Started working last night. It's way more laid back than Red Lobster, and I'm not used to it at all. I felt over dressed, and over polite to everyone. At first, it overwhelmed me. The other server, Danielle, was taking 5, 6 tables at a time, where as I'm only used to 3. That'll be a good thing once I get used to it. Everyone there was really cool. I got hit on like 10 times, sooooo I'm thinking I could easily make a lot of money there. YUUUUSSSS! I didn't make a whole lot, but I didn't really expect to. (plus Danielle was jackin all the tables, because she knew everyone, which is understandable, but DAMN) I'm gunna have to learn to be more aggressive and loud.
Shes got me working by myself for an hr tomorrow night. I'm really nervous about that. It seems like its an easy job, but by myself is a totally different story.

Overall.....I'm stoked.

My Response

Today was the first day I actually cried over you since St. Patty's Day.
I cried because I can't even talk to you anymore, because of what you wrote, and because of everything else thats going on in my life.


I never said you never cared, nor do I think that, cuz I know you did.
Do I think you care about me now? Of course not.


I UNDERSTAND why things didn't work out.
I UNDERSTAND why they CAN'T.

Am I hurt? Fuck yeah. EVERYDAY I THINK ABOUT YOU.
Am I angry? Fuck yeah. I want to scream at you and say everything hurtful I can think of but I won't. I've got more class than that, and I've learned from past experiences that that doesn't do any good.


I made a mistake, but really...did you ever want to be in a relationship with me in the first place? No. I knew this for a fucking year, and I stuck around. I could've, (and probably should've) said fuck that, but I didn't. I believed in us, and believed we could get through it.

Am I going around getting drunk all the time and fucking everyone and being a make out whore? FUCK NO. Does it have anything to do with you? FUCK NO.


No girl should ever be the girl on the side, the best friend fuck buddy, waiting to get attention, and needing affection, but never getting it.


Just because a girl wants you to say something, doesn't mean you should, ESPECIALLY if you know how SENSITIVE that girl is to those words.
And did you explain the truth to me? No.

What I DON'T understand is why it was necessary to post that for everyone to see.
I DON'T understand what "cut the line" means, and apparently it means not trying to talk to me, deleting me from your myspace, and cutting me right out of your life.
I DON'T understand why you would say the most hurtful thing you could possibly say to me, and not give a shit.
I DON'T understand why you never wanted to be with me.
I DON'T understand why everyone I get close to LEAVES.
and I DON'T understand how I'm supposed to move on, and why you already have.


The truth is....you never wanted to be with me in the first place, and I fucked myself over by sticking around. All you care about is your music, your friends, and your family. I don't fit anywhere in there, nor did I ever.

I'm just not capable of being loved by anyone. Not my family, my friends, and not even you. I know you might say..."well thats not true," but I'm finding more and more everyday that it is. Thats why I have given up on relationships completely. I don't know what it is about me that people find so hard for themselves to fall for me, stay with me, and love me.


You wanted to move to Minnesota, you wanted to say fuck everything thats here and peace out, you wanted to be by yourself, you wanted to cut the line, you wanted to do whatever the fuck YOU WANTED TO DO, like always. You're selfish and you always will be, and its not gunna get you anywhere except alone.


Thats all I have to say

Do do do do

I have no idea what to do today.
I have 2 rolls of film to develop, but I'll wait and do it before class, so.....I'm bored.
This blog is probably pointless, but thats a-ok.
I think my familys havin a garage sale sometime before my mom and I go to Chicago. Should be pretty sweet. We all have a bunch of crap that we don't need and need to get rid of.
Also, my dad needs someone to paint the deck again. I said I'd do it if he paid me. It took me so long to do it last time, but moneys money.
I haven't even been trying to save money at all. As soon as I get paid I spend it on film, paper, food, clothes, weed, and gas. Hopefully serving for Jeremy's mom will work out. I haven't ever even been there/know what prices are or anything. She wants me to come in and start training tom night. At this point....it was the first job offered to me, so I gotta take it. A part of me just wants to work all summer, but it summers...I gotta have some free time, take a break, ya know?
So far I think I've come up with a pretty good plan.
1. See Columbia College in Chicago.
2. Determine if I like it/can live there.
3. Take a ballet/pointe class in the summer.
4. Work more than usual.
5. Take a year off of school, or maybe just take some photography classes.
6. Work full time.
7. Try to find a roommate/move out by myself if I have to.
8. By the end of the year, get the fuck out of Omaha.
9. No looking back, just moving forward.
I've never felt so determined than I do right now. There isn't anything or anyone standing in my way this time, and there wont be for a long time. The thing that gets me sidetracked everytime is other people. I worry too much about everyone else, when I need to just worry about me. Another problem is guys. I get too involved with some guy and I loose site of myself, and my goals, and I don't care about anything except him. I don't wanna do that anymore. I'm not even trying to get to know anyone like that, I just fuck myself over every time.
Sooooo.....fuck everyone else. Half the people I thought were my friends aren't really my friends at all, I just didn't want to see it.


All I got is me.


Check it out:
















haha jk! You think I would cut my hair that short?? fuuuuck no....

420

Happy 420 kids!





but seriously...

Next Step: Digital & Tilt Shift

I want this camera really bad. It's a Canon Digital Rebel XSi EOS 450D DSLR camera.
I'm glad I have my 35mm camera, and got the chance to learn how to set the shutter and aperature speeds, develop film, and make my own prints, but going to digital would be so much easier. The cheapest price I found for this camera was 1,249.84 at Walmart. (It's brand new, so that could be why). I could always settle for something cheaper, but even so, it'll cost me atleast 500-600 for a decent digital.

Also, I want this lens.



This is a tilt shift lens. It allows you to correct for the effects of perspective, by shifting the lens. It's mostly used for architectural, or areal photography. Here are some example pictures of what it does.







Pretty fuckin sweet huh?


We learned about a photographer on Wednesday by the name of Vincent Laforet. He actually came to Omaha last weekend, but my teacher forget to tell us about it. I was pissed. He was a photographer for the New York Times for a long time, and later became an areal photographer. You can see his work here ---> http://www.laforetvisuals.com/main.php
Seriously, he's amazing, check this out.


I'm going to start posting all of my images on photobucket. The website is here
http://smg.photobucket.com/albums/v231/kramekrame/
Click on Photography.

I uploaded some today from this week that I printed up. There's not a whole lot in the color one yet, (obviously) but check it out. I'll try to upload them as soon as I can, it just takes awhile. The ones you see now in the black and white album are for my line and architecture assignment. Our next assignment is place. We have to shoot places that mean something to us, or have a story behind them, or just places that we enjoy. I was going to do this today, but the damn rain...ugh. I was sure it was supposed to be sunny today too. There's always tomorrow I guess.

Check this shit out.


Enjoy.


And feel free to give me some feedback.

Omaha teens will need permission slips to attend concerts at bars

BY KAREN SLOAN
WORLD-HERALD STAFF WRITER

Omaha teens who go to concerts at two of the cities’ newest music venues will need more than just tickets.

They’ll need their parent’s permission.

The Omaha City Council today passed an ordinance with new rules for those younger than 18 who want to attend concerts in venues where alcohol is served.

They would be required to turn in a notarized parental consent forms to get in the doors of the Saddle Creek Record’s Slowdown in north downtown and the Waiting Room in Benson. More venues could fall under the new rule, though it’s unclear how many will pursue that option.

The ordinance means that the Waiting Room and Slowdown can continue to hold all-ages shows, as they have been doing for close to a year. But it will create an extra layer of red tape for club owners and for teens who attend shows.

Owners of both the Slowdown and the Waiting Room said the permission slips are a compromise they can live with.

"It will be a minor inconvenience for the front door people, and it will probably take a little longer to get people in," said Jason Kulbel, co-owner of the Slowdown. "But it solves more problems than it creates."

The ordinance was approved a 5-2 vote, with Councilmen Frank Brown and Chuck Sigerson voting against the measure.



I need a permission slip from my mommy to get into a show?? LAME.

I feel...

I feel like I'm in a really weird state of mind lately. The weathers been shitty and it sucks. It rained all day on Thursday. The one day I had off, and it rained, and was really depressing outside. I tried to keep myself busy though. I feel like I'm constantly doing things all the time now. If I'm not working, I'm cleaning, doing laundry, taking pictures, developing pictures, running errands, and buyin shit I don't really need. I guess I tend to do that though, make myself busy all the time, so I don't have to sit here and think about everything that sucks right now.
I think it's gotten worse at my house. None of us are ever here all at the same time. My sister will be with Tyler or at work, my mom and dad at work, and that leaves me waking up to an empty house everyday. Whenever we get home, we all do our own thing. My sister sits in her room with the door closed, my dad watchin some show in the living room, while my mom watches the same fuckin show in her room, and me sittin in the basement watchin tv. When I got back from Minnesota, I wanted to try really hard to bring us together, but no matter what I do, it's not working. It's like we don't know how to talk to eachother. I try to hang out with my sister and talk to her, but it's just weird for some reason. It shouldn't be, she's my sister, but it is, and it sucks. It just makes me feel so alone. I don't know how much more I can take of it. I need someone to show me they care, on a daily basis. Maybe that's hard to understand for some people, why I act the way I do, why I get angry about things like that in my relationships with my friends and lovers, it's how I am. I don't know how to change it.
I haven't talked to Keith in almost a month now. It's a really weird feeling. I think this is probably the longest I haven't talked to him. I'm not sure how I feel about it. A part of me thinks this is stupid and I just want to call him, but another part of me is still angry, and hurt to the point where I don't want to talk to him, or know anything about him. He said one of the most hurtful things he could say to me, and he knew it, and he said hes moving on but I don't feel any different than before. My mind hasn't registered that yet I don't think, but I have to do the same. It's gunna be so hard, and part of me thinks that no matter what I do, a part of me will never move on. I'm trying, slowly.
I need to find a job asap. Summer is almost here and I need to have a job lined up. I don't know what to do. If I don't find anything that pays at least $10, I'll have to go back to serving. I really don't want to do that, but I know I'll make bank if I do. I just need to get out there ad apply already. I only work Friday and Saturday next, how weak is that? I don't understand why they keep givin me a bunch of hours one week, and none the next.

It's time to take a shower, and get ready for work.


peace

Mobile Pictures

I have some pictures I took from my phone awhile ago, thought I'd post them here.



This was on one of the walls in Cherron's house. I'm not quite sure what it means...but I thought it was sweet.



Cherron on his b-day eating a nipple cupcake.



This was also taken in Cherron's house.



I saw this in Thom's bathroom, right before I did a bunch of stupid shit. I thought it was ironic, and had to take a picture of it.



Wine glass.



I took this last night while I was driving home from Shanae's. I was really pissed that I don't have any film right now in my camera. It would've been a sweet picture. The street lights were reflecting off the rainy street, and it was slightly foggy. It was really sweet.

Work

I've been working a lot this week. It's awesome, but its making me really tired. I don't get it. I've been going to sleep between 12-1, waking up at 845 and still wanting to sleep more. I'm working at Village Pointe today. It should be interesting...
I don't really have anything new to say, other than I'm trying to find another job for the summer, and taking a ballet class. Hopefully I'll actually being busy this summer. That's my plan.



I'm still lost.....

Prints

I printed these tonight in class. My assignment due on Mon is lines and architecture. We have to shoot atleast 3-5 rolls of film, so I've been trying to explore around Omaha as much as possible. It's getting really interesting. I'm seeing things I havent seen before, and it's really cool. The weather's been cloudy lately and I havent been able to shoot in a few days. It's making me restless and anxious. It's supposed to be sunny Friday and Saturday, and I work at night so that's perfect. Can't even wait.



This is backwards...I have to fix it


This one I'm in the process of messing around with still. I'm going to really bring out the sun, and make the bottom darker. For some reason...it cut off like half of this picture.



This is my favorite one so far. This too is backwards, but I think it turned out awesome. I can't stop looking at it. It took me awhile to get it right, and I'm so happy with it.(minus the little white spots that annoy me)


I don't think anyone really reads this...but if you do, give me some feedback!

Peace

Should minors be allowed at music venues serving alcohol?

BY KAREN SLOAN
OMAHA WORLD-HERALD STAFF WRITER

If people under 21 can't attend concerts in Omaha, the city's nationally recognized music scene will suffer.

That's the message musicians and club owners sent to the City Council on Tuesday during a public hearing on an ordinance that would allow music venues to continue to admit minors during concerts.

Without the ordinance, venues like the Slowdown in north downtown and the Waiting Room in Benson could be forced to shut minors out of performances.

"It's very important to the artists . . . to be able to play to an all-ages audience," said Marc Liebowitz, co-owner of the Waiting Room. "If we had to take a step backwards, it would really put Omaha at a disadvantage."

That argument did little to convince members of several anti-drinking groups that those under 21 should be allowed to go to concerts where alcohol is sold.

"It is - at every level - a bad idea," said Diane Riibe, executive director of Project Extra Mile, which works to fight underage drinking.

Riibe and others told the council that no amount of security measures can ensure that minors don't drink at concert venues, and the Omaha Police Department doesn't have the manpower to enforce such measures even if they are adopted.

The issue stems from a gray area in Omaha's liquor laws. Bars are prohibited from admitting minors. But facilities such as the Qwest Center Omaha, the Sokol Auditorium, the Orpheum Theater and social halls are allowed to serve alcohol and admit minors.

The Slowdown and the Waiting Room fall somewhere in between.

Both businesses hold all-ages concerts where alcohol is served but operate as stand-alone bars when no shows are booked. Minors aren't allowed in when no concerts are scheduled.

Deputy City Attorney Tom Mumgaard said that since the Slowdown and the Waiting Room make most of their money from alcohol sales, they fall under the rules for bars, meaning that no minors should be admitted. The club owners have interpreted the law differently, believing that they were exempt from the no-minors rule.

The proposed ordinance, which was introduced by Councilman Jim Suttle, would clarify the situation by creating a new category of businesses called music venues.

The music venues would be allowed to admit minors as long as they followed certain security measures, such as having wristbands for those 21 and older and serving alcoholic and nonalcoholic drinks in different glasses.

Opponents of the ordinance said they are worried that those over 21 will purchase alcohol and pour it into the glasses of minors. They also told the council that minors would be at a greater risk of drinking and driving if the ordinance were approved.

"This speaks to a tragedy waiting to happen," Riibe said.

David Jacobson, an attorney representing the Slowdown and the Waiting Room, said neither business has been ticketed by police for serving minors.

The City Council is scheduled to vote on the proposal Tuesday.

Councilmen Dan Welch and Jim Vokal said they hadn't decided if they will vote for the ordinance, but both said the current law needs to be modified.

"Is it fair to tell them (the Slowdown and the Waiting Room) that they can't have alcohol around minors when the Orpheum, the Qwest Center, bowling allies and social halls can?" Welch asked.

The council heard from several musicians who said that attending concerts as teenagers is what inspires many to pursue music and that shutting out teens is a bad idea.

Matt Oberst, father of noted indie-rock musician Conor Oberst, told the council that his three sons went to all-ages concerts as teenagers in Omaha. Those experiences helped shape them, he said.

"These types of shows . . . are extremely important to the creative process," Matt Oberst said.

Chad Rozniecki, who teaches bass guitar, said nearly all his students became interested in pursuing music after attending concerts in their younger years.

Slowdown co-owner Jason Kulbel said his business isn't viable without alcohol sales, which help cover the cost of bringing in bands. On the other hand, he said, it would be "pretty devastating" if the Slowdown could no longer hold all-ages shows.

"The amount of shows that would come to Omaha would dwindle," Kulbel said.


I saw this in the paper today. I have two words..bull shit.